Today we ask you to know that there is no circumstance in which abusive behavior is “okay.”

In many places in your society, there are patterns of “acceptable” abuse.

Hazing rituals, for example, are considered acceptable abuse.

In many professions, it is commonplace for superiors to behave abusively toward their subordinates.

The more “successful” a person is, in terms of egoic standards — wealth, fame, etc. — the more “acceptable” it is for him to be abusive.  Wall Street tycoons, Hollywood directors and actors, politicians — such people are often publicly and famously abusive, but there is no recourse against their behavior.  So long as they are rich and powerful, their behavior is tolerated and even encouraged.  It may be dismissed as a personality quirk, a hazard of dealing with the rich and powerful.

Abusive behavior of course occurs everywhere, wherever someone finds himself in a position of authority over weak, dependent people.  So parents are tyrants with their children, teachers abuse students, children abuse weaker children, and so on.  

Then there are the large scale abuses: powerful corporations against third world workers and the environment, corrupt governments and dictators, and all the innumerable forms of vicious cruelty that humans perpetrate against other humans.

This is why you must understand that there is no such thing as “acceptable abuse.”

Please understand this.

The difference between a boss abusing his employees, and a dictator abusing and killing his people is only a matter of degree.

The difference between a parent behaving abusively toward a child, and a corporation exploiting third world factory workers is only a matter of degree.

Abuse is abuse.  Cruelty is cruelty.  Tyranny is tyranny.  Enslavement is enslavement.

Parents who abuse their children, even with the good intention of “toughening them up,” are preparing them for a lifetime of receiving abuse and perpetuating abuse.  It normalizes cruelty.

It is a terrible thing.

Abuse is not “okay.”

It is true that animals and primates behave abusively toward each other, perpetrating violence in order to maintain a hierarchical pecking order.  Human abuse is an outgrowth of these animal forms of abuse.

But humans are not apes and chimpanzees.  Truly, they are not — even if many of them behave like apes and chimpanzees, in terms of their aggressive impulses.

Human can transcend these primal patterns.  Many humans have successfully done so.  Many heroes have stood up and said “No more” to endemic systems of abuse and enslavement.  The great progress of the modern era has been in rejecting and repudiating such abuses.

Abuse is not “okay,” in any form.  It is never normal, or cute, or just the way things are.

When a healthy parent holds a newborn baby in his arms, does he think: “My job is to prepare this infant for a lifetime of cruelty and abuse.  First, I will abuse this child at home so that he gets accustomed to it.  Next, I will send him out into the world, where teachers, other children, and bosses will abuse and torture him all his days.  Finally, when he is an old man, he will be abused in a nursing home.”

Almost no one thinks such thoughts, holding a newborn.  But many parents, acting unconsciously out of the abuse they received as children, in practice do just that.

This is why the single best thing you can do as a human is to heal your own consciousness, and get calm and stable within your mind.

A person who is calm and stable in his mind does not behave abusively toward other humans, and cannot perceive any scenario in which abusive behavior is “acceptable.”

Within your universe there are a great many worlds in which such behavior would truly be perceived as “alien.”

Today we ask that you let go of the need to continually “figure things out.”

There is a very high value placed on “figuring things out” in your world.  People with strong opinions about things, who claim they’ve figured something out; people marketing “new systems”; “analysts”; “consultants” — such people often receive a great deal of  validation for “figuring things out.”

Individuals are always trying to “figure things out.”  They’re always trying to figure out how to make more money, or be more productive, or achieve recognition, or be better at their job, or be better parents, or invent a better mousetrap.  

And there is nothing wrong with the desire to improve one’s life, or create good for mankind.

However, trying to figure out how to systematically improve one’s life by achieving specific external goals is, to a large degree, a fool’s errand.

This is because “figuring things out” is actually at odds with the true source of physical, mental, emotional and spiritual well-being.

And what is the true source of physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being?

1. A calm, alert, stable mind; one that is grounded within the present moment.

2. A basic faith in the goodness and meaningfulness of reality.

These two things will create well-being in your experience of life.

But you do not find a calm mind or faith by “figuring things out.”

You find a calm mind and basic faith by relaxing, letting go, trusting reality, and thinking less (which is the purpose of meditation and meditative practices.)

Do you see how “figuring things out” is really a backwards way of creating well-being?  It is tilting at windmills.

Your peace lies not in gaining control of what is “out there.”

It lies in creating a stable internal state of mind.  

Today we ask that you work with what is right in front of you.

Many people spend a lot of mental energy fantasizing about imaginary events in the future, or obsessing about things that happened in the past — usually wishing that they could change the past so that they could be living some different life.

Meanwhile, life is unfolding right in front of such people, and they are blind to it.  They might as well have virtual reality goggles strapped to their faces, running all these past and future projections.

You can tell when people are in this state, because they don’t really seem to be present or listening when you speak to them.  They are perpetually distracted, with a kind of fog or haze over their eyes.  Often they will cut you off in mid-sentence to interject some thought of their own.  That’s because they haven’t been listening to you; just their own mental chatter, which bursts forth from their mouth.  

Such people are jittery and bored, always looking for the next thing to do, always thinking about what they ought to be doing instead of what they are doing right now.

It is a very miserable way to live life.  It is also utterly exhausting, to have one’s mind constantly running all these past and future projections.  It is a major source of fatigue, and nervous burnout.

How much better you would feel if you could just calm down your mind, and focus on what is right in front of you.  Consider how much more effective and productive you would be, if you could focus with calm attention on performing whatever task is immediately at hand.

Think of what a good friend, partner, or parent you could be — if you could quiet your mental chatter and actually listen to the person who is speaking to you.  If you could respond to them, as they actually are, rather than answering to your own mental projections, or thinking about all the other things you could be doing right now.

Consider what a great benefit to the world even one person who moves through life with this kind of calm clarity is.  What a great coworker, friend, partner, or parent such a person is.

Beyond that, a life lived with consciousness is a life truly lived, rather than slept through.  One feels a vitality, an enthusiasm, and a sense of excitement when a life is lived this way.  What will happen next?  You don’t know — but you are ready to meet whatever it will be with full attention.

How can this be done?

By recognizing that fantasizing about the future and obsessing about the past is an addiction, and in reality very destructive behavior.  Like all addictions, it is hard to stop, especially because “everyone else does it.”  But the first step in dropping this behavior is by recognizing that it is in fact an addiction, and not good for you.

Just start paying attention when your mind is running away with you into fantasies of the future, or ruminating about the past.

Whenever you notice it is happening, label the thought “future,” or “past.”

Then gently see if you can bring your consciousness back to whatever is happening around you or inside you right now.

Do you want to “save the world”?  Consider what a world populated by calm, present, focused people might look like.  Then exit that projection, and start with yourself, right now.  Work with what is right in front of you.

Today we ask that you learn to trust your higher wisdom.

Most people live in a state of perpetual inner conflict — between the Voice of their True Self, and the Voice of their False Self.

The Voice of the True Self is usually identified with the heart, and the intuition.  It is a sense that is deeply felt within the physical body.

The Voice of the False Self also be called the Inner Critic.  It is identified with the head, and is totally cut off from and at odds with the physical body.

The True Self is sometimes called the soul, or the spirit, or the Higher Self.

The False Self is sometimes called the ego, or the Lower Self, or the Destructive Self.

The two voices are actually very easy to identify, although the False Self is always very tricky, and likes to pretend that it is the True Self.

The Voice of the True Self speaks from a place of love.  One feels very strong, integrated, and at peace when in alignment with the True Self.  It is associated with truth, courage, and heroism.  The heroes of fairy tales are often identified with the True Self.

In “Star Wars,” Luke Skywalker, Obi Wan, Yoda, and the Rebels are allied with the True Self.

The Voice of the False Self always speaks from a place of fear.  One feels weak and frightened when in its sway.  You do things not out of the love of doing them, but because you afraid not to.  There is no love here — only guilt, obligation, manipulation.  This Voice is controlling.  It feels stifling, repressive, and strangling.  It is judgmental, and intolerant.  It can be violent.

It is “The Dark Side.”

As in movies, the Dark Side will invariably advertise itself as the Voice of Reason.  It may be a cold, persuasive voice that insists on its rightness and sensibility.  Or it may be the rage-fueled voice of hatred, bigotry, and intolerance.  They are two sides of the same coin.

The Dark Side may give you a brief rush of power, but in the long term you always be drawn into deeper misery and suffering by following that path.

The True Self has a lightness to it, a vibrance, a sense of space and freedom.  It is playful, and joyful.  

The False Self is always a prison.  It may be a gilded prison.  It may look like a mansion — and still be a prison.

What is true in archetypal stories is true in life.

If you follow the Voice of the True Self, you may be in for a scary and challenging adventure.  Many obstacles will arise to test your faith.  But you will have friends to help you on the journey.  And you will find your courage, even when things look dark.

If you follow the Voice of the False Self, the path may initially seem more secure and comfortable.  But something will be gnawing away at your soul.  Your life will feel joyless, meaningless, and empty.  You may resort to increasingly self-destructive behavior just to feel temporarily more alive.  In the long term, you will meet with failure and frustration.  All your efforts to control life and the people around you will fail.

Whereas if you follow the path of the True Self, in the long term you will discover a deep, lasting, and unshakeable inner peace.  You will become Obi Wan, or Yoda, and remain calm, stable, and rooted in your integrity even in the presence of Darth Vader.

Which would you rather be?  

The choice is yours, at every moment.

Today we ask that you take good care of yourself.

Each of you has been given, in this life, a body.  The body houses your organs, your skeletal structure, your muscles, glands, blood, lymph, immune system, nervous system — all these intricate and magnificent parts that comprise the physical house of your immortal spirit.

Take good care of what you have been given.

Love your body.  Love it, as you would love a little child, or a beloved animal.  Your body truly is your best friend in this world.  You are never alone; your body is always with you.

So take good care of it.  Be kind to it.

It is a very sad thing, to act like the body is separate from you, that it is in any way dirty or shameful, or that it is your adversary.  To hate it for the way it looks, or is shaped.  To be angry at it because it does not function the way you want it to.

Your body’s function is at this moment mostly perfect, or you would not be alive within it.  For you to be alive, countless things must go on inside you all at once, with perfect timing.  The complexity of your physical body is vast — truly, it is as vast as any galaxy.  This is not an exaggeration.  A human body and a galaxy are similar in many ways — there is, in fact, a basic structural similarity.

So for a moment stand in awe of this magnificent thing, this physical home for your spirit.  Appreciate it for all it does for you.  Focus on what works, not on what frustrates you.  If you are alive, it is working very well.

Scientists are a long way away from manufacturing anything with the level of complexity of your body.  In fact, they have discovered that utilizing existing biological machinery gives them a great advantage in the creative process, so advanced and perfect is the biological machinery within existing life forms.

Bodies are precious.  Truly, you cannot know how precious they are.  So take very good care of what you have been given.

Imagine if you were given, for free, an extremely expensive, top of the line luxury car.

You’d want to take good care of it, wouldn’t you?

Your body is worth billions of times what the fanciest luxury car is worth, and it has been given to you for free.

Take good care of it, and it will take good care of you.

Today we ask you to look at that part of you that wishes things were more “normal.”

Normalcy is highly prized in your society.  As children, you are expected to develop in a “normal” way, hitting the normal markers at the normal times.  In school, “normal” children tend to receive validation and encouragement, whereas a child who is strange or odd is a cause for concern.

Really, is there a worse word than “abnormal”?  To be abnormal is to be defective, a freak.  Abnormal things are discarded and thrown away.  Abnormal things must be normalized.

While there has been some progress in your world in terms of accepting and tolerating that which appears to be strange, or abnormal, the forces of normalization remain potent, and constantly struggle to seize control.

Depending on how much you were exposed to the normalizing conditioning of parents and teachers when you were a child, you may have an inner compulsion towards normalcy.

This may be true even if you consider yourself an exceptionally progressive and tolerant individual.

While you may champion the rights of the marginalized and oppressed, you may still have a very strong internal craving for “a normal life.”

If you investigate this within your consciousness, you might be quite surprised.

The normalizing force often intensifies as people age.  When young, people might be comfortable rebelling against social norms, but as they get older — particularly when they have children — the internal pressure to fit in and just be normal can intensify.

This explains the common phenomenon of “people turning into their parents” as they age.  As children, they may have found their parents repressive and stifling.  But as adults with children of their own, they begin to identify with the repressive, normalizing forces that so chafed at them when they were young.

This is something that happens when people are very unconscious and asleep in life, playing out conditioned, programmed patterns.  Usually, a sign that this is the case is that such people are very miserable, without fully grasping why.

Sometimes people will engage in self-destructive behavior in order to regain some sense of autonomy and self despite all their efforts to be “normal.”  So they will cheat on their spouses, or become drug addicts or gambling addicts.  Sadly, such behavior is very predictable.

The way to avoid that sad outcome is to resist the urge to normalize.

Value your individuality, your weirdness, your abnormality.  Never try to be “normal” and fit into some kind of societally-approved role.

That is truly the best way to be a partner to your spouse and a parent to your child.

You must remain within your own integrity, even if that means going against the normalizing force.

This never stops being true.  It is not just true for children and young people.  It is true for everyone, at every age.

Never do something just because it is the “normal” thing to do.  That is a terrible motivation for action, and will only lead to misery.  Then you will become the unhappy spouse or parent, and no one will enjoy living with you.

Even if you think of yourself as a free spirit, stay conscious of this.  The normalizing force is a potent thought form in your society, and has ways of creeping in when you are unaware.

If you are “abnormal” — good for you.  That is a sign that you are awake, and alive.  The most vibrant and creative people in your world are always thoroughly “abnormal.”

Today we ask that you look at the ways in which you are jealous of other people.

Perhaps you are jealous of people who are richer than you.

You might be jealous of people who are more conventionally successful than you, achieving recognition.

You might be jealous of someone who lives in a bigger house.

You might be jealous of someone who is more physically attractive than you, by conventional standards.

You might be jealous of someone who is very well-liked, and has many friends.

You might be jealous of someone who has better health than you.

You might be jealous of someone who appears to be very lucky in life.

You might be jealous of other people with children.  If you do not have children, you might envy someone who does.  If you do have children, you might envy someone whose children seem smarter, or better-behaved, or somehow more “normal” than yours.

If you have children, you might be jealous of the freedom people who do not have children possess.

You might envy someone else’s artistic talent.

You might envy someone else’s intelligence.

You might envy someone else’s happy relationship, or marriage.

You might envy someone else’s happy childhood, or supportive parents. 

Freelance workers envy salaried employees, and salaried employees envy freelance workers.

Women might envy men.  Men might envy women.

Black people might envy white people.  White people might envy black people.

Children envy grown-ups, and adults envy children.

It goes on and on and on.  There is no end to all the ways in which people envy other people.

Always, it is better to be someone else.  Always someone else gets all the breaks, and you never do.

Often, it is said that “Money is the root of all evil.”

This is not so.  Money is neutral.  It is neither good nor bad.

Jealousy is the root of all human “evil.”

If you look to the root of all wars, all genocide, as well as individual murders and, in truth, almost all crimes committed, you will always find that the seeds of jealousy were sown at some point.

There is nothing more destructive and insidious than jealousy.  Jealousy drives otherwise sane people to do terrible, unthinkable things.

There is no circumstance in which jealousy is healthy.  It is a purely destructive force: one that destroys friendships and relationships, and sows enmity and discord between all people.

Knowing this, we encourage you to pay attention to those times when you are feeling jealous.

It is very good to identify this thought pattern as toxic, and destructive.

Once you are conscious of this, you can begin to examine the objects of your jealousy.  Always you will discover that what you envy is not based on reality, but rather a mental projection.

For example, you might be jealous of some celebrity.  In reality, you do not know this person at all, and have no idea what their day-to-day life really is.  You might be quite miserable if you switched places with them.

If you look carefully, you will always see that other people do not have all the breaks.  You will perceive that every living human struggles in different ways.  Rich people are no happier than people with much less money.  Conventionally beautiful people are no happier than “average” people.

Envy is always based on a lie.  If you become clear in your mind, you can perceive this.

Whenever you feel jealous, that is a sign that it is time to carefully examine your thoughts.

Above all, do not act on jealous impulses.  This will always lead to greater suffering.  

Please know that there is nothing healthy or useful about envy.  Jealousy is a purely destructive force.

Today we ask that you begin to let go of your attachments to particular outcomes.

Attachment to outcome is one of the biggest hindrances and energetic blocks most adult humans experience.

Very young children do not engage in activities with a strong attachment to outcome.  They play, and explore.  Yes, the human brain enjoys a sense of “reward” — hearing a sound when you press a button, the satisfaction of a puzzle piece fitting into the right place, or the reward of a sweet food treat.  There is hardwiring in the brain in regard to “reward.”

However, when young children learn to walk and talk and eat food with a fork or chopsticks, they are not experiencing a strong attachment to outcome.  They are simply learning and growing.

If a young child was attached to everything working out in a certain way, he would never learn to do all these remarkable things.  If he were attached to the outcome of walking perfectly like a grown-up, he would be too self-conscious to waddle around and stumble and fall down the way all young children do.

In short, attachment to outcome shuts you down to the process of learning and growth.  You are so focused on the end result, that you lack the patience and willingness to make mistakes that is required for any growth process.

Certainly with any creative endeavor, it is essential that you not be attached to outcome.  You cannot ever know where the process will take you.  That is the core excitement of the creative process.

To attach to outcome in any creative process is to strip the process of creativity itself.  When you paint by numbers, then you know what the outcome will be.  Of course, there is no creativity involved.  You are painting by numbers!

Most people are deeply uncomfortable with uncertainty, and strongly attached to things working out in a particular way.  Unfortunately, this way of being is completely out of alignment with the fundamental energy of life itself.

Life does not know where it is going.  When new life is created, it’s an experiment.  Genes are mixed and matched — who knows what will happen?  That’s the fun of it.  That’s the adventure.  Attempting to rigidly control outcome squeezes all the magic and joy out of life.  It is also impossible.

Trying to rigidly control outcome is like trying to dam the ocean.  You are expending a massive amount of energy and force on something that is doomed to fail.

You must unlearn what you have learned.  In school, you were taught to attach to the outcome of good grades.  You were taught to attach to the outcome of getting into a good college or university.  You were taught to attach to the outcome of a successful career, and all the conventional trappings of a “modern successful life.”

For many of you, things did not go as planned.  Some of you may feel like the victims of injustice, because of this.  If so, that is because you are still attached to an outcome that did not happen.  Others have moved on and let go.  If you have let go and learned to flow where life takes you, good for you!  This is a great step in the path to awakening and fulfillment.

It is not your fault that you learned to attach to outcome.  Most of you were trained and programmed to do so.  However, like many things in your current society, this way of thinking and being simply does not work.

The best environment for growth and creativity is one in which the process is valued as much or even more than the end result.  One in which there is room for flexibility, experimentation, and falling flat on your face.  

No matter how you were trained, it is never too late to create a healthy growth environment in your own life, and to teach the next generation a healthier, freer way of being.

Today we ask that you not be so hard on yourselves.

You are all making progress, whether or not you can perceive it.  It is happening all the time.

It is very good to look back on your journey and see how far you’ve come.  How much you’ve grown.

Day to day, this growth may be imperceptible.  But when you look back, it is easier to see.

So: you are growing all the time, whether you know it or not.

Being hard on yourself only interferes with this process.  You can imagine that yelling at a plant because it is not growing fast enough won’t do any good.  Some of you can even see that expressing your anger and hostility toward a plant could slow its growth.

That is what being hard on yourself is like.  It won’t stop you from growing, but it can slow things down. It can also cause illness.

It is really no use to be hard on anything: plants, animals, children, other people, or yourself.

This doesn’t mean, be complacent, or don’t challenge yourself.

Great teachers know how to challenge their students while nurturing and encouraging them at the same time.  Great teachers also perceive and accept that each student is an individual, and do not try to force them to fit into a specific mold.

Great parents are the same way.

Sadly, there are many teachers and parents who do not know how to strike this balance between healthy challenge, and encouragement.  This is usually because they themselves have been poorly parented and taught, and they have not learned a different way.

Even if you were poorly parented and taught, it is never too late to learn a different way.

Please do not be hard on yourselves.  Support and encourage yourselves.

Then you will be in alignment with the energy that at all times fosters growth, and life.

Celebrate how far you have come.