Today we ask that you give people space.

Really, what people want more than anything in this world is space.

That does not mean, leave them alone.

Space means literally space.  Room.  Room to breathe.  Room to relax.  Room to be themselves.  Space.

Space to get back to their true natures.

This is what people want more than anything.  More than money or fame, what people really want is space.  Peace.  Calm.

It is the greatest gift you can give.

You give people space by not imposing your will on them.  You do not attempt to control or manipulate them in any way.

You give people space by really listening to them when they speak.  You quiet your own thoughts, so that you can be present, and listen.

You give people space by accepting them for who they are, without wanting to change them.

You give people space by not arguing with them.  Their opinions and beliefs do not truly threaten you.  And the more you fight them, the more intractable they will become.  So let go of the need to argue.

Be silent with others.  Let them speak.

You do not have to agree with them.  You can think they’re crazy.  Maybe they are.

If you were visiting a psychiatric institution, would you try to argue with a crazy person?

No.  You would not argue.  If you loved that crazy person, all you would do is try to create a loving space for him.  People can only become sane when they are given space.

Give people space.  It is the greatest gift you can give.

Today we ask that you trust other people.

We know this is difficult for many of you, because of traumatic experiences you may have had in the past.

And yet it is good to cultivate a position of being trusting with others.

It is not easy, but it is good.

This is because people who are basically trusting, in turn are trustworthy.

You will see that this is true, if you think about it.

People you may consider naive or gullible are usually very honest, and do not hide things.

People who are very paranoid and suspicious are often those who engage in untrustworthy behavior.

Liars tend to be the most paranoid about being lied to.

Thieves tend to be the most paranoid about being robbed.

Haven’t you noticed this?

But people who seem gullible and foolish do not hide anything.  These are the ones you can really trust.

Clever people are always trying to be clever.  They keep things hidden.  You cannot really trust someone who is always trying to be clever.

But the people who are very trusting, even if you consider them foolish — those are the ones you can trust.

So it is good to trust people.

This doesn’t mean you won’t get burned.  That may happen.

But a trusting person is happier, on the whole, because he is trustworthy.

As the Tao Te Ching says: “He who does not trust enough, will not be trusted.”

This is very true.

Better to be someone who trusts and gets burned from time to time, than a suspicious person who lives in constant fear and paranoia.

The trusting person is much happier.

Today we ask that you go where you are sent.

What does this mean?

In life, you all have your desires.  You have an image of what your life should be like.  You may have very specific goals that you want to attain.  And there is nothing wrong with this.

But sometimes reality has something different in mind for you.  It may ultimately be in alignment with your deepest desires — desires that come from the heart, not the ego — but the path to getting there may be quite unexpected.

When you experience blockage around a desire, this is often what is happening.

The path is leading you somewhere different.  Somewhere unexpected.

For example: sometimes there is blockage in a romantic relationship.  The desire for a deep, loving connection is in alignment with your True Self.  However, the object of your affections may not be an energetic match.

In that situation, you will experience blockage, and frustration, until you let go of the relationship.  The path is leading you elsewhere — perhaps to someone else, who is a better energetic match for you.

So: that is what it means to go where you are sent.  

When you experience a lot of blockage, it is not because reality has it in for you.

You are being nudged in another direction.  It may still lead to your heart’s desire, but along a different path.

So, in general, it is good to go where you are sent.  When unexpected things happen, it is a sign that reality is leading you down a different path.  Do not resist that flow.  Go with it, even if it sometimes feels frightening, or uncomfortable.

Go where you are sent.

Today we ask that you know you are not a worthless person.

This world is full of people who strive to prove that they are worth something.

The reason they do this is because they believe they are worthless.

If you didn’t believe you were worthless, you would have no need to prove that you are worth something.

But because you believe you are worthless, this is what you do.

You try to prove that you are worth something.

As a young person, you strive to get good grades, so you can get into a good school.   You do this in part because you think it will make you worth something.

As an adult, you strive to make a lot of money.

You strive to accrue possessions.

You strive to achieve recognition and success.

You strive to achieve fame, and prizes.

You strive to associate yourself with rich, successful, well-known people.

You think that it will make you worth something.

Or you strive in other ways.

You strive to be the most perfect mother who has ever lived.

Or you strive to be very pure in your living.  You strive to be super-“green,” perhaps.

You strive to be athletic, to display a great talent, or to be a “genius.”

You strive to be a saint, and help the oppressed and downtrodden.

You strive to be a martyr.

You kill yourself working hard to build a better life for your children — so that they may in turn strive, and in proving their worth, prove your own.

That is how you prove you are worth something, in this world.

Can you imagine what life might be like if you let all of that go?

If, for a moment, you really let go of striving to prove you are worth something?

And you were just okay being you.

You could just be you, with nothing to prove.  Nothing to defend.  Nothing to justify.

Can you imagine how calm and relaxed you would feel?

Just try, for a moment, to imagine who you would be if you didn’t have to prove you were worth something.

You are not worthless.

You do not have to prove anything.

Can you imagine that you might be easier to live with, if you didn’t have to prove you were worth something?

That you might be a better partner, spouse, or parent?  If you could just be okay being you, for once.

This world would be so much happier, so much saner, if only people stopped trying to prove they were worth something.

You are worth everything.  Every human child born is worth everything.

Today we ask that you not be a slave to old patterns.

Patterns are basically repetitive, self-perpetuating cycles that occur when there is a kind of mindlessness, or unconsciousness.

So: there are patterns of addiction.  Addiction is a fixed pattern of negative behavior.  Typically one feels a craving, one gives into the craving, one feels a temporary rush or high, followed by a crash.  There is usually guilt, and self-recrimination.  The addiction may go dormant for a while, but will inevitably start up again.  

Unless you break the pattern.

Anyone who has liberated themselves from addictive behaviors knows how difficult this is.  And yet it can be done.

Breaking the pattern requires an increase in consciousness.

Instead of sinking into the mindless, repetitive behavior, there is a conscious effort to stay awake and present enough to resist the downward pull, and do something different.

You break patterns by increasing consciousness.

This is true for all patterns — and not just the ones associated with classical addiction.

There are many kinds of patterns.

One very common pattern is that of “people turning into their parents.”

It may be that as young adults, individuals resolved that they would be nothing like their parents, especially in regard to their parents’ negative behaviors.

And yet, as people grow older, and particularly when they have children of their own, they find themselves “turning into their parents” — engaging in the same negative behaviors that they hated growing up.

This, too, is a pattern.

People follow genetic and cultural patterns.  They may inherit their parents’ predilection toward certain addictions, or mental or physical illnesses.  Or, culturally, they may inherit their parents’ prejudices, their religious fanaticism, and so on.  

These are all patterns.

Most people in any given generation do not break these patterns.  They may resist them when they are younger, but by middle age, they sink into their genetic and cultural matrices, and “turn into their parents.”

And yet in every generation, there are many who break free.

Patterns can be broken.

You do not have to be a slave to your addictions.

You do not have to be a slave to your genes, your childhood indoctrination, or your culture.

You can break these patterns.  And you can do it by becoming more conscious.

Becoming more conscious simply means becoming more present.  You are less mindless, more mindful.  Instead of operating on “auto-pilot,” sort of sleeping through your existence, you wake up and find yourself in your body, here and now.

In addition to increasing general well-being and focus, pattern-breaking is perhaps the greatest practical benefit of meditative practices.

Meditative practices include any practice that gets you present and grounded within your body, in the here and now.  This can be traditional meditation, or physical practices like yoga, tai chi, or other gentle, grounding forms of exercise, massage, or energy work.

The more you cultivate consciousness in a meditative practice, the more you can stay conscious in daily life — and that means not getting trapped in your old patterns.

Today we ask you to notice your thoughts.

The typical human mind is continually flooded with thoughts.  It thinks, and thinks, and thinks.  It takes in information, and thinks about it.  It imagines scenarios.  It thinks about the future and the past.  Most of the thoughts flash by so quickly that you are not fully aware that you are even thinking them.

If you could slow down the thinking process and really examine what goes through your mind, you might be surprised.

This is because much human thought is quite nonsensical, and really rather insane.

“I am a worthless person.”

“My husband doesn’t really love me.”

“That person who cut me off in traffic is a horrible human being.”

“That woman is wearing ugly earrings.”

“I am fat.”

“The world is doomed.”

“I wish I were rich, like that celebrity on TV.”

“My children will never amount to anything.”

“What if I die from some terrible disease?”

And on and on and on it goes.  If you could just sit and and listen to it playing on a recording, it might sound to you like some crazy person ranting and raving about imaginary things.

Which is essentially true.

One of the practical benefits of any meditative practice is that it gently brings you into a greater state of awareness about your thoughts.

As you focus on your breathing — on simply staying conscious of your inhalations and exhalations — your thinking process slows down a little.  Just enough for you to begin to pay attention to this loud racket that is going on in your brain.

You begin to have some distance from your thoughts.

And a tiny bit of distance is all you need.

You see, you are not your thoughts.

Really, your True Self exists in the stillness that lies between and beyond your thoughts.  You exist in that very still, peaceful place that you experience when your mind is clear, calm, and alert.  Sometimes this happens naturally when you are seeing, hearing, or experiencing something very beautiful and true — like a sunset, or a symphony.  For those moments, everything stops; and you are in the still center of things.

The more you can become calm and present, the less power your thoughts will have over you.

They will still arise.  They will still tell you that you are worthless, and that terrible things are happening.

But you will not believe them so easily.  You will watch them and hear them, but not believe them.

So that is one reason why meditation is very useful.  It can help you to stop believing all the crazy thoughts that rattle around your head.

And when you’re not in the grip of your thoughts, the experience of life becomes much more enjoyable.

Today we ask that you really listen to the people you are close to.

Many of you are in relationships.  Often there are ongoing tensions and arguments between people — spouses, boyfriends, girlfriends, parents, children, friends, partners.

You may believe that the other person is making some sort of mistake, or doing the wrong thing.  Perhaps you feel personally threatened by what the other person is doing.  You wish they would make different choices, and live in a different way.

Some of you may spend time mentally arguing with projections of these people, even when they aren’t there.

We invite you, this day, for a few moments to let go of your arguments, and your desire for this person to do things differently.

Just in your mind, please sit quietly with this person you are close to.

Sit quietly, and stop fighting with them.  Reconnect with your warm, caring feelings toward this person.  Maybe feelings you had in the past, if it is hard for you to feel it now.

Now, in your mind, ask this person:

What do you really want?

Why are you acting this way?

How can I help you?

And just notice what comes up.  Sit quietly, and really imagine what the other person might say to you, if he or she truly felt safe with you in this moment.

Listen.  Listen.

It is good to practice doing this in your mind, with someone around whom you feel frustration and conflict.

When you practice listening to the other in your mind, you can begin to do it in real life.

It is amazing how hard it is for people to listen to each other.  Learning to listen can totally transform your relationships.

Today we ask that you pay attention to what your mind is doing.

For many people, there are only two states of being:

The first is an anxious state.  

In the anxious state, one is excited, agitated, and nervous.  The mind races.  The stomach feels tight.  The blood pressure is elevated.  Often one feels on edge, and irritable.  The mind is easily distracted, the attention flitting from one thing to the next.

For many, this is what it is simply to be “awake.”

You drink coffee, work yourself up into this nervous, jittery, overstimulated state.  This is how you “get work done.”  This is how you run your errands and write emails and check Facebook and look at the internet.

The second state is a sleepy, dreamy state of being.

In this state, one has more or less “checked out.”  This state commonly occurs when you are watching television.  Your mind is still drifting from thought to thought — in fact, you are not really focused on the TV show.  You might even fall asleep in this state.  Many people actually find it easier to fall asleep in this checked out, dreamy, TV-watching state than they do in bed at night.

So it is very common for people to spend their whole lives drifting between the nervous, anxious, distracted state, and the dreamy, half-asleep state.

There is a third way of being.

This is a state of calm alertness.

The body is relaxed, but the mind is very clear, and sharp.  It is not distracted, it is not racing.  Rather it is totally focused on whatever it is doing.

There is no nervousness, no anxiety.  The stomach is loose.

There is no sleepiness, no torpor, no dreaminess.

This state of calm alertness is really far more awake, in truth, than either the anxious state, or the dreamy state.

Cultivating a calm, alert consciousness is the most significant practical benefit of meditation.

In meditation, the practice is to empty the mind, by focusing on the breath.  One watches the inhalation and the exhalation of the breath, and observes the thoughts but does not get caught up in them.  As thoughts arise, one returns to focusing on the breath.  

One of two things usually happens when one first attempts to meditate:

The mind is busy, and races with thoughts.  You cannot focus on the breath.

Or the mind gets sleepy and dreamy, and you cannot focus on the breath.

This corresponds to the “anxious state” and the “dreamy state” in ordinary waking life.

In meditation, you train yourself to settle into the third state: which is a calm, alert focus on the breath.

It is usually very difficult for novices to maintain this state.  Even if you can only hold a few seconds of calm alertness in a ten or twenty minute meditation, this is a real achievement.

But with practice, the little windows of calm alertness expand.  And then you find that you can bring calm alertness into your daily life.

If you are someone who always feels either basically nervous or sleepy, there is a whole dimension of life experience that can open up to you by engaging in simple meditative practices.  And if you are someone who wishes to “do more” with life, cultivating the state of calm alertness will be of immeasurable benefit to you.

Life is meant to be experienced and enjoyed, not slept through.

Today we ask that you learn to be okay with states of rest and “non-productivity.”

In your culture, resting is deeply stigmatized.  The virtuous person is someone who is continually active, continually doing.  “Workaholism,” even though labeled in the language of an addictive disease (which it is), is considered admirable and virtuous.

This is a highly destructive belief system.

The human body requires rest.  All bodies require rest.  Animals sleep.  Even plants have sleep cycles, though you do not observe them.  Babies sleep.  Children sleep.

Yet human adults, somehow, are not really supposed to sleep.  It considered admirable for a person to function on little sleep — for it is a sign that he is accomplishing more with his life, getting more done.

We cannot overemphasize how destructive this belief is.

Adult humans require sleep, just as much as animals and children do.  It is nonsensical to expect adult humans to function well on minimal sleep.

During states of rest and sleep, the human body processes what it has taken in during the previous day, and it engages in repair and growth processes.

Basically, when you sleep, your body “cleans house.”

This is literally true.  During sleep, the body cleans itself of accumulated toxins, and debris.

Not sleeping is like not cleaning your house.

Mess, dirt, and germs build up.

Eventually this can lead to a systemic crash.  You get sick.  You may experience a health crisis.  You certainly will experience mental and physical instability.

Do you know what would make your society run much better?

If businesses instituted an official “nap time,” like young children have in preschool.

You would see productivity increase.  You would see much less interpersonal conflict and more harmony between people.  You would see major reductions in physical and mental illness.

This is absolutely true.

People need to rest and sleep.  Expecting people to function optimally on minimal sleep is ridiculous.  It is crazy, and destructive.